Lock in a year of learning and secure a $$$ bonus offer! Learn More.

Do You Struggle with Disengaged Learners?

July 15, 2024

Years ago, I used to get really annoyed when I facilitated PD and saw people browsing Facebook during an activity or while I was giving instructions. Sometimes, they were shameless: I’d hover next to them, hoping my proximity would redirect them, but they didn’t stop. I’d ruminate on their rude behavior and design coercive strategies to try to control them, but those rarely worked. 

Three things I’ve learned about this experience:

  • “Annoyance” is anger. According to how emotions are classified, annoyance is a form of anger. And anger is often a “secondary emotion” that masks fear, sadness, and shame. So I felt sad, fearful, and ashamed when learners scrolled on social media. Blaming others is a maladaptive way of discharging an uncomfortable emotion. But feeling angry is exhausting and ultimately doesn’t help me process and release underlying emotions. 
  • Nothing is personal.  The stories I told myself about their behavior made me feel upset. As I shifted those stories, I felt better. Maybe they scrolled FaceBook to get a little cognitive reprieve from the content. Maybe the activity was outside of their ZPD. Maybe they didn’t really want to be there. Whatever the reasons were, it wasn’t personal. 
  • Clarity is magical: Now when I present workshops, I clarify expectations from the first communication and throughout the experience. I ask for presence. I explain the “why” behind an activity. I describe what happens to our minds when we multitask. I make sure the activities are as meaningful and relevant as possible, and that there’s some kind of accountability for engaging. I recognize my role in creating the kind of space and experience where people want to be fully engaged, the whole time. I recognized that their behavior isn’t a personal attack on me, and that I can take responsibility for how I create and facilitate the space. 

I could tell you another 25 things I’ve learned about people disengaging on their apps (or in email, or texting, or shopping) during PD sessions. There is so much that goes into creating an experience in which people learn. 

And guess what? During workshops that I present, from time to time, I still see someone scrolling on social media. And guess what? Once in a while I feel irritated (also a form of anger) but more often than not, the flicker of emotion passes quickly and I am amused by how I was once so upset. 

Keep Learning:

  1. Subscribe to my Weekly Wisdom Newsletter to get content like this sent right to your inbox
  2. Download the Core Emotions Tool to learn more about how emotions are classified
  3. Take our Artful Design and Facilitation workshop to develop your skills as a PD facilitator

More Blogs

View All Blogs

Say, "Goodbye," to Resistance

November 18, 2024

You can instantly remove resistance with this one simple move.

Read Article

My Advice: Feel the Feeling

November 18, 2024

Whatever you’re feeling right now is okay. But I do have one piece of advice: feel what you’re feeling. 

Read Article

Why You Need to “Pull-Back-the-Curtain” in Your PD

November 11, 2024

Presenting engaging, transformative PD isn’t rocket science, and it isn’t magic. There are fairly simple, straightforward things you can do to transform your PD sessions.

Read Article

My Top Strategy for Making the Most of Limited PD Time

October 28, 2024

Have big PD dreams and only a small amount of time? ‍Dread wasting time and want to ensure your PD is as efficient as it is impactful? ‍I have one strategy that will help you tackle both PD challenges.

Read Article

Bright Morning Podcast

View Podcasts

Soliciting Feedback from Your Admin: Coaching Demonstration

October 28, 2024

Coaching an Emotions-Resistant Client: Coaching Demonstration

October 21, 2024

Navigating Client Cancelations: Coaching Demonstration

October 14, 2024

Using the Gaps Framework: Coaching Demonstration

October 7, 2024

How to Open and Close a Coaching Conversation: Episode 219

September 30, 2024

Navigating First Observation Nerves: Episode 218

September 23, 2024

The Getting-to-Know-You Conversation: Episode 217

September 16, 2024

Aligning Expectations Between Coach and Admin: Episode 216

September 9, 2024

Designing Impactful Coaching Goals

September 2, 2024

Crafting Your Personal Vision for the School Year

August 26, 2024

Six Things Coaches Need to Know Before School Starts

August 19, 2024

Determining Your Schedule for the School Year

August 12, 2024

How to Introduce Yourself to Clients

August 5, 2024

How to Coach Behaviors: Coaching Conversations

July 29, 2024

Coaching Behaviors: Teacher-to-Student Interaction Tool

July 22, 2024

How to Coach Behaviors: The Gaps Framework

July 15, 2024

Coaching Behaviors: Planning for the Conversation

July 8, 2024

How to Coach Behaviors

July 1, 2024

How to Coach Beliefs: Coaching Demonstration

June 24, 2024

How to Coach Beliefs: Create New Beliefs

June 17, 2024

Coaching Beliefs: A Simple Three-Step Tool

June 10, 2024

How to Coach Beliefs: The Drama Triangle

June 3, 2024

How to Coach Beliefs: Five Things You Need to Know

May 27, 2024

Coaching Conversation: Coaching Core Human Needs

May 20, 2024

How to Coach Towards Agency

May 13, 2024

How to Curb Your “Fix It” Tendency

May 6, 2024

Core Human Needs and Coaching Conversations

April 29, 2024

How to Coach Ways of Being

April 22, 2024

Building Strong Coach/Admin Relationships

March 18, 2024

Sneak Peek #1: Inside Elena’s Newest Book!

March 25, 2024

Sneak Peek #2: Inside Elena’s Newest Book!

April 1, 2024

Sneak Peek #3: Inside Elena’s Newest Book!

April 8, 2024

Sneak Peek #4: Inside Elena's Newest Book!

April 15, 2024

What to Do When You’re Not Feeling Compassionate or Curious

March 11, 2024

What You Need to Know about Classroom Walkthroughs

March 4, 2024

How to Set Up Meeting Process Observers

February 26, 2024

Coaches of Color, It’s Time to Honor Your Needs

February 19, 2024

How to Use the Ladder of Inference in Your Coaching Conversations

February 12, 2024

I Don’t Want to Co-Sign THOSE Feelings.

February 5, 2024

Try It On: Supercharge Your Learning

November 27, 2023

Try It On: Let Your Coachee Lead

November 20, 2023

Try It On: The Power of Silence

November 13, 2023

Try It On: A Question to Unlock Our Power

November 6, 2023

Try It On: A Question to Surface Underlying Beliefs

October 30, 2023

Try It On: A Confidence Building Sentence Stem

October 23, 1987

Try It On: Less Talking, More Impact

October 16, 2023

Try It On: Learn from Your Coachee’s Non-Verbals

October 9, 2023

Try It On: Improve Your Communication with Non-Verbals

October 2, 2023

What You Need to Know About Taking Notes During Your Coaching Conversations

September 25, 2023

How to Prepare for a Coaching Conversation in Five Minutes

September 18, 2023

How to Set Goals with Your Coachees

September 11, 2023

How to Introduce Yourself as a Coach

September 4, 2023

How to Introduce Coaching to New Clients

August 28, 2023

The Six Elements of Transformational Coaching

August 21, 2023

The Six Most Important Things to Know If You're a New Coach

August 14, 2023

Proactively Mitigating and Responding to Harm in Group Spaces

August 7, 2023

Facilitating PD: Post-Event Reflection

July 31, 2023

Designing PD: Reflection Before the Event

July 24, 2023

Designing & Facilitating Team Meetings - Part 2

July 17, 2023

Designing & Facilitating Team Meetings: Part 1

July 10, 2023

Navigating Contagious Negativity

July 3, 2023

Can I Coach Here?

June 26, 2023

When Someone Is “Too Far Gone” for Coaching

June 19, 2023

When “Equity” is Prohibited

June 12, 2023

Coaching Conversation: Finding Your Power

June 5, 2023

Coaching Conversation: ACE In Action

May 29, 2023

Three Resilience Boosters You Haven’t Heard Before

May 22, 2023

The Role of “Self-Care” for Educators

May 15, 2023

Five Ways to Normalize Emotions in Your Coaching Conversations

April 17, 2023

What do we mean by “every conversation is an equity conversation?”

April 10, 2023

Coaching When You’re the Boss

April 4, 2023

Responding When Emotionally Activated

March 27, 2023

How to Build Your Team’s EQ

March 20, 2023

How to Close Your Coaching Conversations

March 13, 2023

How to Determine Your Coaching Conversation Area of Focus

March 6, 2023

Transformational PD Part 3: Responding to Resistance

February 13, 2023

Transformational PD Part 2: Six Transformational Tips

February 6, 2023

Transformational PD Part 1: What It Is and Why You Need It

January 30, 2023

Coaching Resistance: Part 3 - Coaching Demonstration

January 23, 2023

Coaching Resistance: Part 2 - Preparing OURSELVES

January 16, 2023

Coaching Resistance Part 1: What is Resistance?

January 9, 2022

How to Set Yourself Up For a Great Year

January 2, 2023

In Conversation with Dr. Dena Simmons

November 28, 2022

Disrupting Racism at the Dinner Table…And Beyond

November 21, 2022

Disrupting Racism in Coaching Conversations

November 14, 2022

Why We Need Affinity Spaces

November 7, 2022

Microaggressions 101

October 31, 2022

Coaching Conversation: The Final Conversation

September 26, 2022

Coaching Conversation: Phase 4: Build New Practices

September 19, 2022

Coaching Conversation- What Happens when You Trust the Process

September 12, 2022

Coaching Conversation: Building Relationships and Trust in Phases 1 and 2 of Transformational Coaching

September 5, 2022

Transformational Coaching in Action - Phase 1: Surface Current Reality

August 29, 2022

Limited Series: Starting the School Year Strong - Setting Yourself Up to Coach

August 22, 2022

Limited Series: Starting the School Year Strong Considerations for a Thriving Coaching Program

August 15, 2022

Limited Series: Starting the School Year Strong The PD You Need

August 8, 2022

Starting Strong: The Power of Vision

August 1, 2022

Do What You Can: In Conversation with Sharon McMahon of @SharonSaysSo

June 27, 2022

What to Read This Summer with Dr. Kimberly Parker

June 20, 2022

Coaching Joy

June 13, 2022

Coaching Sadness

June 6, 2022